HAPPY THIRD ANNIVERSARY! Wedding Date: 8-18-18
Updated: Oct 25, 2021
Two autistic weirdos happened to meet online and then haven't really been apart since. When you find that PERFECT person....why would you want to spend time with anyone else? Total a year, we spend about a week's worth of time apart. It's hard to function without the other half of my brain (no literally as he has certain functions I am lacking though I've worked on them for almost two decades now). He was forced to work on social interactions through his family growing up and I, had to work on the executive functioning side. So when it comes to dealing with other people and conflicts, he has to step in. Life has only improved since we have been together!
I had never found someone I would be so comfortable with within 26 years of my life. Not ONE came close. Hell, not even all my 'closest' friends and family combined are even close!! It does help that our Autism overlaps and we have very similar experiences and processing issues. It IS possible for Autistics to find their perfect half, though statistically, it is very difficult and almost uncommon. Oddly in our scenario, his older sister (also Autistic) has found success as well in finding her perfect partner. Lucky!!
I used to think that I had too high of standards and that I was expecting too much from a potential partner. Nope. John meets and EXCEEDS all those standards I ever thought. Now we aren't talking about looks. I'm talking about character, ability, skill, drive, interest, humor, fun, etc. THOSE characteristics. He meshes with me absolutely PERFECTLY. And the best part? It feels like I get to spend every day having a sleepover with my best friend!! And I haven't felt otherwise since we got married! This is our THIRD year together and every day I thank God for bringing me the best gift ever. I only really wanted two things in all of life and my existence and I got one of them!
Now we didn't start out that way. We both went through immense traumatic experiences that had greatly impacted our lives. It became a hindrance and a disability for the amount of struggle we were going through. Though because of these challenges, we grew to be the person we needed to be for the other. We stepped up and met those challenges and gained insight into how to be better people and to grow together.
I will say, that we have discovered quite a few secrets and methods of improving the self while preparing for the perfect partner. I am hoping to work on that to give others the best chance at finding someone right for them and being able to settle down. But I typically try to wait for others to ask me (as a few have). Though it will not bring your partner to you right away, you will begin to fully enjoy life until you run into this person made just for you. You will also be prepared to not ruin any chances for when you do find them. These methods worked for us, and they worked for those I helped. Autism is mostly just being stuck in all the minute details of every motion, word, or expenditure of energy.
My dear, these past few years have just been simply amazing. Even the darkest struggles that many couples never encounter: homelessness, broke, jobless, disabled, hospitalized, threatened with death threats, deep depression with suicidal thoughts, insomnia, PTSD nightmares, and many more. We've survived and we are now THRIVING! Here's to many more years together my love! It is crazy to even think that we have lived so many years without each other. Almost seems like another lifetime. What other crazy adventures and experiments will we accomplish together?!
Wait to find your perfect match. It will be worth it. And yes, there is no doubt that you will know EXACTLY when someone is perfect for you (who also matches your excitement about you being perfect for them too!). KEEP GOING!
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